Skip to main content

KoOOl Definations

TRAFFIC LIGHT: apparatus that automatically turns red when your car approaches.

PIONEER: early American who was lucky enough to find his way out of the woods.

PEOPLE: some make things happen, some watch things happen, and the majority has no idea what's happened.

SWIMMING POOL: a mob of people with water in it.

SELF-CONTROL: the ability to eat only one peanut.

CANNIBAL: person who likes to see other people stewed.

EGOCENTRIC: a person who believes he is everything you know you are.

FOREIGN FILM: any movie shown in Texas theatre that isn't a western.

MAGAZINE: bunch of printed pages that tell you what's coming in the next issue.

COLLEGE: The four-year period when parents are permitted access to the telephone.

EMERGENCY NUMBERS: Police station, fire department and places that deliver pizza.

OPERA: When a guy gets stabbed in the back and instead of bleeding he sings.

BUFFET: A French word that means "Get up and get it yourself."

BABY-SITTER: A teen-ager who must behave like an adult so that the adults who are out can behave like teenagers.

TATTOO: Permanent proof of temporary insanity.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

CANNE-DEMONIUM

The scene resembled that of a pre-independent era, set in the Indian territory of Puducherry, where the French were trying to infiltrate India and inflict pain upon us with their advanced weapons. Except that it was mid-May 2007 in the French town of Cannes and it was the Indians trying to infiltrate France and inflict pain upon them with our Bollywood movies. One of the stars who made her presence felt at the Cannes Fest was Preity Zinta who was there to promote her theory that she did not have an affair with Louis the XVI that caused a rift between him and Marie Antoinette. The French media responded by asking her, “Qui l’enfer vous est?” (Who the hell are you?). She screamed a flurry of obscenities in Hindi at them and asked them to pardon her French. Rumors floated that Hrithik Roshan was seen flying around the area with his right hand up in the air screaming, “The double-thumb is here.”John Abraham,...

Uncounted Blessings

Whenever we gather together, The words are not easy to find, But love speaks a common language When people have ties that bind. We don't always say what we're feeling As often as families should; We don't count our blessings out loud, But somehow they're understood. We know that we're thankful for living With the comfort of each other's care; We're grateful for memories and stories, And the jokes that our family shares. We might leave a promise unspoken, But we know that we're loyal and true; We can count on companions through life, In the sunshine and shadows, too. We might show some special attention To a stranger, acquaintance, or guest, But we never forget in our hearts About those that we really love best. These blessings can never be counted Like money or gold dividends; They can only be shared as the love That exists when families are friends

Five Phrases...We Should Practice

The best manner to avoid having negative attitudes and emotions control our bodies is simply to practice the wisdoms that we have been given throughout the Qur'an and Hadith. We should say, 1 "Alhamdullilah" It produces calm and health to practice saying, "Alhamdulillah" for what we have 2 "Insha'Allah" for what we intend 3 "Subhana' Allah" when we see something exciting or amazing 4 Astaghfir'Allah" when we lose our tempers or become weak. and most importantly 5 "Allahu Akbar" when we are faced with the challenges of life. These five phrases, said regularly, are like taking a multi-vitamin for holistic health. There is much wisdom in the Prophet's (SAW) statement (narrated by Abu Huraira), "The strong [person] is not the one who overcomes the people by his strength, but the strong [person] is the one who controls himself while in anger." In fact, staying patient and calm is key to physical strength.